Fighting fascism — Day Thirty-Nine – “Fraternizing with the enemy

One of my previous blogs discussed the importance of talking with strangers. I encouraged readers to take advantage of opportunities to engage with people in public places as a way to combat fascism. Here, I want to delve more into the issue of talking to people you know who are misinformed on a particular topic or hold very strong opinions that are counter to the ones discussed in these blogs.

I must admit that I don’t know anyone who voted Republican in the last elections (maybe I do and it’s a secret). Years ago, I could boast a clutch of Republican friends – now none. This means that I have few opportunities to discuss the political situation with people I know and with whom I do not agree. I know that that is not the case for all of you. A good friend told me that her mother and sister have bought into an extreme version of MAGA (very religious, millenarian, super “anti-DEI”, and in excessive fascination of Trump and Musk). Conversations leave her very upset and for good reason – they often become emotional and vitriolic. Another friend met some Republicans in Egypt and felt ill-prepared to engage in a full-blown discussion on taxes, DEI, and other issues. So here are some tips on how to carry on these conversations.

Be informed as much as possible on the hot topics. Whether you initiate discussions or are ambushed, it is good to know your stuff. I haven’t put much focus on getting informed as a way to fight fascism. This is partly because I thought that we were already drowning in information. Although partly true, I think that it would be a good idea to be prepared to discuss the hot button issues that are on today’s agenda: the attacks on the federal government;  foreign aid, diversity, equity and inclusion, immigration, and Ukraine to start. (I added a few links to get started – you can certainly do some research on AI or search engines to find out more). On the suggestion of a good friend, Colin Woodard is a very interesting source for understanding the enduring and growing split in the American polity between right and left.

Engage as an anthropologist rather than a combatant. I already discussed this in my former blog but it would be good to remind us of some key principles. The following is what I think is a pretty good guide for how to engage that I got from ChatGPT (who would have thought that ChatGPT would want to combat fascism – I’m going to write a future blog on the role of AI in the resistance).

Set the Right Mindset

• Approach with curiosity, not combat – Think of the conversation as an opportunity to understand their perspective rather than a debate to win.
• Acknowledge common values – Even if you disagree on policies, you might both care about fairness, safety, or opportunity but see different ways to achieve them.
• Decide your goal – Are you trying to learn, share your views, find common ground, or persuade? Adjust your approach accordingly.

Listen Actively and Respectfully

• Ask open-ended questions – “What led you to that perspective?” or “How do you see this issue affecting your life?”
• Don’t interrupt or dismiss their views outright – Instead of “That’s ridiculous,” try, “That’s an interesting take—I hadn’t thought about it that way.”
• Paraphrase their argument – “It sounds like you’re saying [X] because you believe [Y]. Did I get that right?” This helps avoid miscommunication.

Express Your Views Thoughtfully

• Use “I” statements instead of “you” accusations – Instead of “You’re wrong about this,” say, “I see it differently because…”
• Acknowledge complexity – Say, “I get why people feel strongly about this,” or “It’s a complicated issue with a lot of perspectives.”
• Find common ground – If possible, highlight shared concerns or values before discussing where you diverge.

4. Manage Emotions and Tension

• Stay calm and composed – If you feel yourself getting heated, take a breath or suggest a break.
• Avoid personal attacks – Focus on ideas, not the person.
• Know when to disengage – If the conversation is unproductive or hostile, it’s okay to say, “I appreciate the discussion, but I think we should pause here.”

5. Accept That You Might Not Change Their Mind

• People rarely shift political views immediately. If you plant a thoughtful idea, it may influence their perspective over time.
• Sometimes, simply having a respectful conversation can reduce hostility and reinforce mutual respect.

Use one’s expertise to one’s advantage. We are all experts in something – education, foreign policy, LGBTQ+, immigration, etc. Use your knowledge to advocate for a better world without fascism. Create situations where you can share your expertise. Here are a couple of examples.

My wife volunteers for SOS Mediterranean here in Marseille. SOSM is an organization that rescues refugees who are traversing the Mediterranean Sea in leaky boats for European shores. Most refugees leave from Libya where they experienced unimaginable horrors. SOSM is considered by many on the right in Europe as a very controversial organization, accusing them of increasing the access of immigrants to Europe. They are definitely in the crosshairs of the right-wing government in Italy (many of the refugees that are rescued by SOSM are taken to Italy because that is the closest destination, which is the practice endorsed by international law). As a volunteer, Laurence often makes presentations at schools and other sites to explain what SOS Mediterranean does, the issues that it attempts to address and that they are an organization driven by humanitarian aims, not political ones. The encounters are generally very positive. She is well informed and knows how to address participants who hold different perspectives.

A friend recently went to his mother’s church where he made a presentation on the importance of USAID diplomacy and defense cooperation and why maintaining our alliances is critically important to secure in US national interest. This is a subject on which he has intimate professional and personal knowledge. He continues to seek venues where he can express his deep knowledge on these topics to a variety of stakeholders who might not start from the same place.

I would like to leave you with something that Umberto Eco wrote about thirty years ago on “recognizing fascism”.  He lists fourteen features or that can promote fascism. “These features,” writes the novelist and semiotician, “cannot be organized into a system; many of them contradict each other, and are also typical of other kinds of despotism or fanaticism.” But it is enough that one of these features is present present to allow fascism to coagulate around it. I count about ten features that buttress the current administration. Here is his argument in his own words.